


Here To Stay

by mainstreamFragment



Category: Mass Effect
Genre: Angst, Canon Compliant, Canon-Typical Violence, Established Relationship, Fluff, M/M, Oneshot, Prompt Fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-08
Updated: 2015-12-08
Packaged: 2018-05-05 15:44:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,866
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5380850
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mainstreamFragment/pseuds/mainstreamFragment
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When Shephard's life is endangered on the battlefield, Kaidan does everything in his power to save him.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Here To Stay

Shephard gasped as he felt the slight tug at his skin behind his ear.  _Fuck_ ,  _this is it_ , he thought as he realized that he couldn’t see out of his left eye. Warm liquid began to trickle down his neck. Static rang in his ear. White hot pain surged from the depths of his head. He tapped the receiver in his helmet to message the Normandy as his head grew light from the impact, but all that came out of his throat was a harsh gurgling sound.  _Blood_ , Shephard realized as his entire head started throbbing from the horrible pain that was two parts numb and ten parts burning fire. 

His receiver chirped back to life. “Shephard?” someone cried frantically over the com unit. 

 _Kaidan’s voice_ , Shephard realized as he tried to blink the growing pain away. He tried his best to reply, but nothing came out around the blood. More popping and hissing noises of breath frantically rushing through the blood.  _Shock_. The pain began to dull, but Shephard’s vision grew brighter, intense white light creeping in from the edges of his vision.  _Fuck_ ,  _please get here in time_ , he thought as he felt his body collapse to the hard ground under the burden of its own weight.

~*~

Kaidan sprinted through the shuttle bay toward the Kodiak. “Cortez! I need an emergency drop ASAP!” he bellowed as he secured his Phaeston to the back of his armor.

Cylinders hissed as the drop ship’s loading door slid open. “Send me the coordinates!”

Kaidan jumped into the back of the Kodiak, nearly falling as he landed, his legs shaky from the panic creeping through his body. As he dashed to a seat at the side of the dropship, he activated his omni-tool and sent the coordinates as quickly as he could manage that Shephard’s suit had transmitted with his last distress call. “I don’t care what it takes, Cortez. I need to be there five minutes ago.”

“Understood,” Cortez offered as the Kodiak lurched out of the Normandy and down to the planet below. “Shephard will be fine, Kaidan. We both know nothing short of old age is gonna knock him down for good.”

Kaidan knew there was no way Cortez could know that, but he couldn’t let himself think about Shephard dying. All Kaidan could think about was that he should never have fucking let Shephard go down on his own. He had insisted that he should be beside Shephard, but John had refused, saying it was too dangerous; he said he didn’t want Kaidan getting hurt on his watch. The damned idiot just had to risk his own life all the time to save the universe. Cortez’s voice distracted Kaidan from his thoughts.

“The closest I can safely drop you is half a kilo away,” he shouted from the front of the Kodiak.

“That’s fine,” Kaidan replied, worry creeping through him. Half a kilometer wasn’t far. But Shephard was unconscious, and Kaidan didn’t have the physical strength to carry him that far, and he’d be pushing it trying to use his biotics to transport Shephard. With the amount of fire raining down on the battlefield below, it was not going to be easy getting Shephard out alive. Or himself, for that matter. Kaidan tried to ignore the heavy knot in his stomach and began moving to the side of the ship as they approached the drop site.

“Get our boy back,” Cortez shouted as Kaidan leapt from the Kodiak to the hard ground below.

Kaidan immediately directed his attention toward where the marker on his omni-tool was indicating. There were multiple bodies littering the ground, and none of them were moving. Kaidan felt like he was going to vomit at the sight, but he had to keep moving. Standing out in the open like this would get his ass mowed down with bullets in no time. He sprinted for the nearest rock formation and ducked behind it. He carefully surveyed the area around him: there were plenty of soldiers keeping the enemies busy. Kaidan saw a direct line between him and where Shephard’s body should be, according to his suit’s coordinates. He took a deep breath in through his nose, concentrated on focusing as best he could, then jumped up and sprinted toward the bodies. Dirt sprayed up around Kaidan as bullets bit the ground around him. He forced himself to ignore the pain of gravel and dirt cutting into his cheeks, and to only let it motivate him to run faster. The quicker he got to Shephard, the sooner they would both be back on the Kodiak and on their way back to Normandy. He had to get to Shepard in time. It was all that mattered. A shard of slate flew up and sliced across Kaidan’s brow. He shouted at the biting pain, but pushed forward.  _Shephard isn’t far now. I have to save him. I can’t lose him_. Kaidan’s breath came in heavy pants, exhaustion beginning to creep into his legs from the sprint.

 _Made it,_ he cheered in his head as he approached the huddle of limp bodies. He quickly threw up a biotic shield and haphazardly slid into place behind it, the coarse ground shredding his light armor even more. He quickly scanned the immediate area, trying to figure out where Shephard was. Kaidan coughed around the bile that rose in his throat as his eyes fell on Shephard’s body: the entire left half of his face was covered in blood, and even more of it was pooling on the ground around his head. Kaidan’s heart was slamming in his chest, and his temples were pounding in pain with the rhythm of his heartbeat.

“Shit, John,” Kaidan whispered as he quickly moved over to Shephard’s body. “Please be alive,” he breathed as he bent over Shephard’s body. Kaidan dropped an emergency beacon for the other three bodies scattered around him; Dr. Chakwas’s team could check on them as soon as possible, but Shephard was his immediate priority. He had to be. Shephard was supposed to save the universe. The Alliance couldn’t survive without him;  _Kaidan_ couldn’t survive without him. The universe needed Shephard more than ever.

“Please, John, we need you,” Kaidan whispered as he carefully slid his arms under Shephard’s body and lifted him. As he began to sprint toward the Kodiak, the shield he had raised earlier shattered and bullets began to throw debris up around them.

~*~

Shaking. Excruciating pain, radiating out from the left side of his head. Rippling down his body, every muscle tense. He was moving. Was he flying? No. Something holding him up. He tried to force his eyes open, and grunted at the wave of resulting pain.

“It’s okay, John. We’re getting back to the Kodiak, and we’re getting out of here.”

Kaidan’s voice. Shephard could barely hear him over the cacophony of gunfire and explosions, but it was definitely Kaidan.

“Our date tonight,” Shephard grumbled as Kaidan quickly dropped behind a large mound of boulders.

Kaidan forced out a laugh. “Yeah, we’ll still have our date, Shep,” he said as he carefully leaned out from behind the cover. “Just gonna have to get you patched back up first.”

Shephard tried to push himself out of Kaidan’s arms. He could manage on his own; he would just slow Kaidan down if he didn’t try to make the final run to the Kodiak on his own.

“Don’t you fucking dare,” Kaidan grumbled as he tugged Shephard closer. “You can’t even stand on your own; I’m not letting you try to fucking run half a kilometer.”

Shephard grunted as another wave of white hot pain roared into his awareness. “Won’t let you get hurt because of me,” he groaned.

“John, I’m not going to risk letting you get hurt again. Just shut up and let me concentrate.”

Shephard let out a yelp of pain as debris flew up from the ground and cut into his hand. The shock of every step burned through Shephard’s awareness as Kaidan dashed toward the dropship. Each step another echo of miserable, throbbing pain through Shephard’s body. Shephard groaned, the extensive pain making him feel like he was going to vomit.

“We’re gonna make it. We’re gonna make it!” Kaidan chanted as his arms wrapped tighter around Shephard.

The pain was getting bad enough that Shephard wasn’t sure he would be able to stay conscious much longer. He let his head roll to the side, trying to ignore the growing nausea. He could see a blurry shape no more than a hundred feet away, and immediately recognized it as the Kodiak. Kaidan would make it. They would be fine. Shephard let out a content sigh as he lost consciousness again.

~*~

Kaidan took a deep breath and jumped into the dropship. “Get us out of here Cortez!”

The Kodiak lurched to life and began rapidly ascending back toward the Normandy. Kaidan carefully dropped down into the seats lining the side of the Kodiak, tucking Shephard’s body against him. “Please don’t leave me, John,” Kaidan plead as dispensed medi-gel to try to heal as many of Shephard’s wounds as he could. He ran his hand through Shephard’s hair, the blood already starting to dry in his hair and making the short black strands stick to Kaidan’s fingers. Shephard wasn’t in good condition; he needed medical attention that Kaidan couldn’t offer. If Shephard could survive the blast from the Collectors, he could survive this, but Kaidan didn’t think anyone could afford to wait months for Shephard to recover. He was the reason the Reapers hadn’t won yet, and there was no one with his potential who could take over while he was recovering.

Kaidan stared at the limp body resting in his arms. Shephard would make it; he absolutely had to. Kaidan tried to fight off the thoughts of what would happen to him—to the universe—if Shephard died. “John, I don’t think you know how much we are all relying on you. I know it’s an unfair burden, but we need you. Please don’t leave us.” Kaidan let out a quiet sob as he hugged Shephard’s body closer to him.

“We’re docking now,” Cortez called from the front.

Good. Just one more sprint up to medical, and then Shephard would be in the clear. He would survive. He  _had_ to survive.

~*~

Bright light flooded Shephard’s vision, so intense that it made his head convulse with the pain of a migraine. He let out a load groan, throwing his hands up to cover his eyes and he squeezed his eyelids back shut. “Kaidan?” Shephard called out frantically.

“Kaidan, get down here immediately,” Shephard heard Dr. Chakwas call from somewhere to his right.

Shephard heard rapid footsteps approaching him as the doctor approached.

“Welcome back to the Normandy, Commander. I wish it could be under better circumstances, but you’re in stable condition. Lady Luck was with you again, it seems: the bullet had a clean entry and exit, and there was only minor damage to your cortex that we were able to fully treat and repair. Lucky for you, there shouldn’t be any dama—”

“John!”

“Kaidan?” Shephard shouted from his bed, not ready to risk opening his eyes just yet. Shephard felt a heavy weight on his chest, and Kaidan’s warm, citrusy scent flooded his senses.

“I’m here, John. I’m right here, and I’m not going anywhere.” Shephard could hear Kaidan’s voice wavering from looming tears.

“Kaidan,” he whispered as his fingers searched for the older man’s short hair, trying to rub comforting circles into the man’s scalp. “How long was I out?”

Kaidan let out a distressed noise, somewhere between a sob and a sigh. “It was just two days,” he answered. “But fuck, it felt so long.”

Shephard smiled despite the pain throbbing through his head. “I’m sorry, sweetie. I didn’t mean to scare you.”

“I know,” Kaidan responded, hugging Shephard even tighter. “You have to stop being the lone protector of the universe. None of us might be as incredible of a soldier as you are, but I’m not losing you to this bullshit, John.”

Shephard sighed. “I don’t want to see anyone getting hurt, Kaidan.” He paused, listening for the other man’s breath. He continued, his voice quieter. “Especially not you.”

Kaidan didn’t respond immediately, prompting Shephard to crack open his eyes to see if he could read Kaidan’s expression. He winced as the bright light flooded his vision. “Ugh, why is it so bright in here?” he grumbled.

Dr. Chakwas answered: “You haven’t been using your eyes for two days, Shepard, and one of them is actually brand new. They’re going to be sensitive for a couple of hours.”

Shephard felt his heart accelerate at the revelation. “I lost an eye to the bullet?”

Dr. Chakwas walked into his field of vision. “More or less, yes. The bullet entered around your brow and exited almost immediately right behind your ear, but the force caused significant enough damage that I had to choose to either leave you with vision impairments or patch you up while the Alliance is still paying to keep you in top condition.”

Shephard felt Kaidan’s arms tighten around him before the older man stood up. “Knowing you, you would kick the Reaper’s asses five times over, even with the impairment, but we figured anything to make your job easier in the fray would be worth it.”

Shephard opened his hand as Kaidan laced his fingers around his. As he smiled up at Kaidan, he heard Dr. Chakwas clear her throat beside him.

“I’ll give you two some time, since this is the longest you’ve spent apart since your first date.” She chuckled as she turned to walk away. “Just don’t overexert yourself Shephard; we might be able to patch you up after all these accidents, but I can’t do much to keep you from passing out again if you strain yourself.”

Shephard let his eyelids slide shut as the door to the medical bay hissed back into place.

“So do you remember everything?” Kaidan asked with hesitance in his voice.

Shephard nodded. After a second, he sighed and answered, “Yeah. I remember it. Thank you for risking your ass to make sure I was safe.”

Kaidan forced out a chuckle. “John, I have had so much time to get to know you—both serving beside you and watching the shit you could pull off while working under Cerberus—and you mean the world to me.”

Kaidan paused, but Shephard didn’t feel like he was finished speaking, so he just squeezed his hand.

“I can’t lose you, John. I don’t care how long we have left in this universe—whether we can even defeat the Reapers—but I’m not spending any time we  _do_ have left without you.”

Shephard slowly opened his eyes, carefully judging how much light he could tolerate. Despite the pain throbbing through his head, his mouth curled into a small smile. “I’m honored that you would want to, Kay.” He tugged Kaidan’s hand, ushering him to come closer to him, “Even if your morning breath does smell like a krogan’s ass.”

Kaidan let out a wild laugh, deep and hearty. “You’re an ass, John, I hope you know that.”

Shephard smiled. “But we both know you wouldn’t love me without my rough side.”

Kaidan’s smile grew wider, somehow darker as his voice dropped in volume. “You know I love your rough side. But,” he chimed, his voice returning back to the caring, worried expression from before, “since you’re far from being capable of that any time soon, you’re gonna have to settle for boring ole ordinary sex.”

Shephard tried to shrug. “I could think of worse things.”

Kaidan chuckled as he leaned down, his lips only  _just_ brushing against Shephard’s. “You’re right. Like missing our date two nights ago, asshole. Next time it’s your turn to pay, you’re not allowed to go and get your ass shot.”

Shephard moved upward, pressing his lips harder against Kaidan’s once he had finished speaking. He felt Kaidan’s mouth curl into a smile against his.

“I love you, John, and you’re not allowed to go anywhere. We’re gonna beat these fuckers, and then you’re going to lose your excuse to skip your turn to pay.”

Shephard chuckled back. “Yeah, you caught me. I  _definitely_ got shot to get out of paying. Because I wouldn’t give you everything to my name to keep you happy.”

Kaidan pulled back from Shephard, letting go of his hand so he could run his own through Shephard’s black hair. “Then you’re not going on a mission without me by your side so I can throw up shields and cover your ass.”

Shephard smiled up at him, opening his eyes a little wider as they adjusted to the artificial light. “Okay, sounds like a plan. But the first time you get hurt—”

“Shep, it’s war. We’re both going to get hurt. But we’re better off if we can cover each other. I promise I will always be as careful as I can, but you’re not fighting without me there to help you out. I’m here to stay, John; I’m not going anywhere.“

**Author's Note:**

> I rarely have time to write any fic of decent length, but if you have an idea or prompt, feel free to drop it in my ask box at mirrorMentality.tumblr.com. I can't promise to write something for all requests, but I'll try my best! Hope you enjoyed; please leave comments and kudos!


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